Talent, Talent...Everyone Has A Talent...

Okay, so everyone has to have a talent...some talents are just more entertaining than others...and thank you to Sir Hotness for sharing this woman's talent with me...watch Ursula Martinez La Magicienne
Direct Link Here

And just as a reminder...or in case you missed my plea for votes yesterday...
I have been nominated as A Best Erotica Writer ... so now, it is your turn to vote...

Read My Novels?
Love My Writing?
Vote For Me Here
Everyday for next Two Weeks
www.bondageawards.com

Best Erotica Writer?

Okay, It's up to you! Official VOTING starts today and goes for two weeks...voters are encouraged to vote once a day. So please, remember me when it is time to vote, especially if you love the characters in Sacred Secrets, Sacred Revelations, or Submissive!

I will have a link at the top of my blog, asking if you have voted for the next two weeks to remind you to go vote...but the rest is up to you!

And to EVERYONE who voted for me in Stage One...THANK YOU for getting me this far!

Happy Birthday, Sir

Today Sir Hotness turned 42...
I promised him a sweet surprise...

It wasn't the cake we made together...
It wasn't the bottle of wine we shared... Ex Umbris... yummy

Later tonight when he least expects it...
I think 42 whacks are in order;)

Happy Birthday, Darling

Nervous About Kink?

I get an email every once in a while from a reader asking how to add kink to their bedroom, when their partner is 100% Vanilla...

Here is a video that introduces a few "toys" that can add a kink to your life...

Define Gender...and then Define Sexual Harrassment

The news is just too compelling today...

First I got so pissed off reading about yet another Texas Airport Security related scandal, I was ready to drive there and picket...even though the drive would take twenty hours...I would not under any circumstances fly into or out of Texas...

But more on that rant in a second...

Because I was so awed by this story:

Thomas and Nancy Beatty are having a baby, although Nancy isn't pregnant, Thomas is. His announcement was released in Advocate magazine in the form of an essay written by him. He explained (no quotes folks...just me relaying the story) that he was once a she and although she had breast surgery and hormone therapy, opted to not have her reproductive organs removed, and has been living as a male. His impending maternity/paternity leave challenges our notions of gender roles and societal norms, since Thomas is legally both male and married to Nancy.


I'm certain that making the decision to have a baby was a hard decision once it was realized that both Thomas and Nancy wanted a child and faced with the fact that Nancy cannot have children. But then perhaps it was the easiest, most natural decision in the world...at least for the couple...the ones shaking their heads will be the ones who didn't understand his decision to become a man in the first place and I applaud his bravery for being who he is and doing what he needs to do to live his life authentically.

Now, back to my rant about Airport Security...
When is too far really too far...and are women targeted more than men?

For me, I've opted to drive the last few years because of my own brush with security a few years ago when I felt unduly harassed and singled out after being patted down more than once at more than one airport (two layovers), including having a security officer run his hands ankle to my thighs...my big mistake...or so I though at the time, wearing a long skirt and I decided then and there it was jeans for me from then on...but as I already mentioned...have since just rented cars. It's so much easier...

My concern is that women always seem the target for unfair treatment...
It wasn't a man who recently died in Phoenix...
And now nipple rings are dangerous?

Yes, it appears so...because Mandi Hamlin was forced to remove her nipple piercings with a pair of pliers while male airport security snickered and laughed at her embarrassment and pain.

Unbelievable.

Even more unbelievable, she was allowed to board while still wearing her belly-button piercing. Is that a contradiction? And at what point are we able to say enough is enough?

Increased security was supposed to keep out terrorists...right? Are we really keeping out terrorists? Or maybe it's just Texas has the real issue of identifying who the real trouble makers are, seemingly especially if they are men. On June 26th a man was allowed to board even though a man with a Middle Eastern name and a ticket for a Delta Airlines flight to Atlanta shook his head when screeners asked if he had a laptop computer in his baggage after an X-ray machine operator detected a laptop. A search ensued revealing a clock with a 9-volt battery taped to it and a copy of the Quran. A screener examined the man's shoes and determined that the "entire soles of both shoes were gutted out." He was cleared to travel even though all of the making s for a bomb was present except the explosive material.

Female Genital Cutting...

Tonight I joined an organization called CARE because of two stories I heard about...

The first is how Abay, a young Ethiopian woman, stood up for what she felt was best for herself at age eight and refused to go through the ritual female cutting that would grant her entrance to the world of womanhood and how that one decision not only changed her life, but the lives of many...watch her story here.

I'm not sure what gave Abay the strength at such a young age to stand up to her mother, her community, and tradition...but I am so thankful she was able to...even though she had to run away and live with a relative...even though she didn't see her mother for a decade...because as an adult she is making a huge difference in her corner of the world and for me I think that is the most compelling human quality...standing up and speaking out.

The second story was about Maria Landa of Peru, who had few options in her life until Care helped her learn a trade...following through again to help her gain a loan to start her own business when no one else would loan money to a woman. Here is her remarkable story.

You can go to my online advocacy page with Care and see how I have taken action. There...you too can take action...sometimes signing a petition, spreading the word, or donating a week's lunch money can make a huge difference. Will you care enough to visit my page and sign a petition? Will you be willing to do more and help spread the word?

And the greater question, what do you think needs changed in your corner of the world? And what are you doing about it?

Now The Fun Begins!

Tonight I signed the contract with Liquid Silver Books for Unholy Promises (Lord Fyre's Story) and sent it in... also filled out the cover art request form...

This is the exciting and fun part of writing...watching my baby's birth...
Whew, this one has been a long and tedious labor so I am glad that I am finally to the FUN parts!
I can't wait to see what the artist comes up with...and April Martinez is awesome and amazing so I have no doubt that it will be wonderful:)

Next comes editing...and for me...equally fun and exciting. I have grown so much working with my editor (not sure that she wants me to share her name here) and I will say that I am a better writer because of her patience on the first novel... Sacred Secrets.

Game Time...

So, someone was brave enough to email, asking what we do with our Friends when they come over...

Uhh...we do what everyone else does when there is company over...we sit around the kitchen table talking, and drinking beer, and drinking more beer...

Here's the list of what we drank...not in order...Leffe, The Original Flag Porter, Ebulum Elderberry Black Ale, Grozet Gooseberry and Wheat Ale, Guiness, Amstel Light, and Coors Light... some awesome and amazing Homebrewed Rye Ale (provided by SH)...

At some point the conversation always turns to philosophy... sex... sex toys... religion... though not in any particular order... at least one person always gets annoyed at another person...

Then there is kissing and making up...

At some point this last weekend we played a round of Sex Through The Ages (A Roxy Harte Game) where the players reenact a period of history... for this weekend we got stuck in pre-evolutionary man... it was just too much fun to go any farther in time... so chimpanzee sex and Neanderthal Sex kind of ruled the night... and may I just say that Sir Hotness does a very fine job role-playing a horny chimpanzee ...

What can I say? Just a normal weekend with friends...

Whew...Survived the Weekend

Friends from KY came and spent the weekend with us...Yesterday, I should have been recovering but I took one look around the house and decided it was a cleaning day. So, today I'm recovering from the weekend and yesterday's over-ambitious jump on spring cleaning.

It's a big house, not a one day job...and one I'm not finishing today...but I will finish stripping the floors which took a huge part of yesterday and I ran out of steam before I was done. Sir Hotness resorted to calling me Cinderella...must have been the scrubbing the floors on my hands and knees part...must have also been an erotic image because it got results;)

Today seems quiet and lonely by comparison, having extra people in the house there's always someone to talk to...having an extra puppy in the house, Jazzi was entertained too...so yesterday and today she has whined for her missing friend all day...lovely, just lovely. I give her toys as a distraction but that only works as long as I'm playing too. I had no idea I had such a needy puppy...

I will be so glad when the weather cooperates and we can put up a privacy fence in the back yard. I think having her outside for part of the day...running, jumping, digging...you know, dog stuff...will be a relief for both of us.

Yesterday I started a diet...I have no idea how this is going to go...I haven't worried about my weight for years...although from my twenties I know how diets work and then I managed to maintain between 108 and 112...but I'm a far cry from that now. Seems my thirties found me ranging between 125 and 140, depending on my happiness level...for me, the unhappier I get, the thinner I get...and vice versa...because right now, I am both the happiest and the heaviest that I've ever been. Yikes!

The problem for me is that I don't feel that I'm unattractive...even at my new bigger me size...until I think about the bikini in the drawer and am I brave enough to put it on? Nope, not happening...

That's when I decided a diet was in order.
I've always had huge success with the low-carb diet...even before it was called Adkins...and attempted starting it yesterday...but that didn't work so well...because two swallows of Pepsi put me over my carb level for the entire day...
Ditto for this morning...half a Pepsi and my hopes of low carb success is out the window...

I have a horrible Pepsi addiction...and I don't even think it's because of the caffeine...it's the carbonation for me. I love that bubbling fizz as it scorches the back of my throat first thing in the morning. It's orgasmic. Kind of like shots of whisky...

Hmmm....
No, I don't think substituting shots of whisky for my Pepsi addiction is a good idea...even though whisky has zero carbs...ZERO...ah, no, really shouldn't do it...

Very tempting though...

Yesterday, even with my Pepsi failure...I managed a two pound deduction today am from yesterday am...if I can maintain that...I'll say I'm having success...

However, if I find myself struggling, I may just have to go to the liquor store;)

It's Official...

Liquid Silver Books has ofered me a contract for Book 3 of the Chronicles of Surrender: Unholy Promises...

Tonight we have friends over and we are drinking dark beer...see my Twitter posts for the entire rundown of what we're drinking...

Yes we're all drinking and surfing...laptops have changed the world forever...as we share our favorite music sites with our fav beers...
On the list:
Beth Rowley
Suzen Juel
Sade
Pogues
Flogging Molly's
Zack Kim
Pentangle
Bad Hats

We're odd...but we are all equally odd...so it works...

It's a full moon so celebrate as you will...

Sunshine! And Happiness!

Yay...we have sunshine in Ohio...finally!

I'm happy! Actually double-happy because last night I finally heard from my middle daughter who works at a fire department... she said, "If you text and I don't respond in four days...then worry."

Is she joking? If I text and she doesn't respond in four hours, I'm already worried...eight hours, I'm pacing...and ready to go find her! I told her, "I know you're busy but if you can just quick text the word "Ok." then I'll know you are alive and we can both get on with what we were doing. She doesn't get it... because she knows she's fine... and because she's a firefighter... she expects danger...and disasters are a pure adrenaline rush...it's what makes her job...her job. And to be fair, she did text me Monday night...I just really wanted to hear her voice because I missed her. So I asked her what she was doing that kept her so busy and her reply was, "Rescuing people who won't stay out of the water."

Crazy but true... as I've seen first hand.

I took three different routes to get were I needed to go yesterday to avoid the water, but I also saw drivers disobeying the "Road Closed, High Water" signs. I guess they were in a bigger hurry than I was...or hate being late (I must not mind at all because I am usually late everywhere I go, unless I set a timer to bring me out of the fog of my writing)... or maybe they haven't experienced tragedy yet on a personal enough level to make them cautious enough to respect how fragile life and the human body really is (I wish I could say that was true for me.)

I worry about my daughter but I'm glad she is who she is, doing what she is doing. I'm proud of her and not because she is a firefighter... but because of who she has become--strong, independent, self-assured and compassionate.

Last night, after talking to her, I got out the old photo album and looked through it. Her dad was only a year older than she is now when he had the car accident that would leave him brain-damaged and a quadraplegic. That tragedy changed who I was too... and I look at the photos of me at twenty-one, weighing in at 106, soaking wet, and wonder where that girl found the strength to do all that I had to do ... to make all of the decisions I was too young to be making about his care ... and working ... and raising my two babies (age 1 and 3 at the time.)

I missed my twenties completely.
My thirties I focused on my career...raising teenagers...and taking care of my elderly parents.

That's why I disappointed my oldest daughter last night...
I understand that she is twenty-five with two babies in the house, and she feels like her youth is passing her by... and I totally understand that my grandbabies make her insane some days and she just wants to escape and have a good time ... but last night I refused to change my plans for this weekend (although I offered to take the babies another weekend) so that her weekend would be more fun. I refused because I already have a fun weekend planned for me... and friends are coming into town that we haven't seen since Fall.

Two years ago, I would have changed my plans.
That was before ...
Before meeting Sir Hotness in October 2006...
Before having to stand up to my children and my friends and coworkers and everyone else who wanted me to do something other than what I was doing ... falling in love ... and feeling like I'd rediscovered my twenties.

I remember my daughter asking me why "This man?"
And I had to tell her the truth... "He's the first man who has made me feel what I felt with your father and I haven't felt really alive since I lost him...until now--with this man."

Call me selfish, but I have a couple lost decades to make up for...

Can We Please Have One Spring Day?!

Geesh...after seven straight days of rain, following our Ohio blizzard, I looked outside tonight and couldn't see the trees in the back field because it was snowing so hard! I don't know about anyone else, but seriously...one nice day with blue skies and no precipitation would really be appreciated!

For those of you celebrating holidays over the next few days...Ostara, Good Friday, Easter...I hope for you blessed days...

I am working on my next two WIP's...
Lights, Camera...Orgasm for Loose-Id which is about a porn star
and
Vow of Silence for Liquid Silver Books which is actually Dr Psycho's story

And...you know me, can't have too many irons on the fire...I'm toying with the details in my brain a bit but the outline appears to be the beginnings of an erotic paranormal...it's on simmer right now, everything is just gelling...but I'm fairly excited that this will be my first break away from contemporary erotica (although I admit I have two paranormals under the bed that I wrote a decade ago and never attempted getting published)

Good news...my Loose-Id editor emailed tonight that his part in the editing process is in progress (And!!! Even bigger...He loves the story! Yay! Always a plus when the editor isn't gnashing teeth). I haven't heard anything about artwork for the cover yet, but I assume it is only a matter of time...the working title remains, "Old dog, New Tricks"... so we'll see if that changes during edits...

And...I found some writer humor at the Mother Goose and Grimm Store...having recently recovered from some writer's block, it tickled me and hopefully will cause you to smile as well...

Friends...

Thank you to everyone who wrote in this week...email, text, private twitters and utterz...I love to know that you are reading my blog...even if you are afraid of the comment boxes...lol...

I understand completely...confined spaces make me crazy too...
And labels...I really hate people labels so don't get me started on that issue...

Back on topic...it seems that my post What Do I Do With My Time: struck a cord with many and more so such exotic sites postings will be made in the near future...and I think you might just like this site...

The man in charge of the site is doing an exceptional job. Here are some "How To Videos" for those of you longing to try some new rope tricks but too timid to seek out classes.

Thank you, thank you, thank you to all who wished me "feel better" notes post chiropractor...I went again today...he said pain was to be expected...hmmmph! I knew that...I'm not totally insensitive to the working s of my body...if someone moves my bones around, I assume I will have discomfort...I do not expect to be stuck on the couch for two to three days heavily medicated because the pain is so intense. I'm annoyed, drinking wine, and trying to hold off on the muscle relaxers until bedtime...

So...today I worked at the real job way too hard (meaning I put in a 9-5 geesh)
And tonight I am curling up with Sir Hotness on the sofa to watch a movie since we are officially out of condoms...and I'm in pain...I accept responsibility for my pain interfering but I'm pointing my finger at him for not going to the drugstore.

Sir Hotness took a vacation day to help me in the garden, but my seed potatoes didn't arrive in time...drats...
We thought we might take a hike, but the wind was insane!
Instead, we bought Guiness and Irish Soda bread...and I came home and made Shepherds Pie for dinner...so we will be eating in five minutes! Yay! I'm starving!

So how are you celebrating St. Patrick's Day?

Good thing today was a Play Day...(I also took all of my seedlings and repotted them in slightly larger pots...)I am soooo excited Spring is almost here!

Tomorrow, I REALLY OVERBOOKED myself...on the other job front...
Ditto for Wednesday...Yikes...what was I thinking?

Tomorrow I also report back to the chiropractor and hopefully he will tell me that excessive pain after a treatment isn't unusual after the first treatment and that things will start feeling better soon! Actually, I had a chiropractor from NY (forgot to ask him if he has a uRL to plug) offer that if I had any questions I could ask...maybe I should ask him if excessive pain is a usual scenario...

Honestly, I don't want to whine...normally I have a very high pain threshold...sometimes too high to safely guage what is too much for myself when it comes to play pain...but this...chronic pain...like a constant toothache...was annoying...now...constant toothache layered over with intense pain...I'm taking pain pills...so far just Ibuprophen 600mg and SOMA...but the problem is I don't want to take any...

The other problem is that the chronic pain is starting to interfere with my everyday stuff...like my yoga practice...my daily walks...my writing...

So, hopefully, tomorrow...he will have all the answers...

Until then...I'm enjoying today and drinking heavily tonight...I love Irish Pub songs! Everyday should be St Patty's Day...

Sexual Confidence...

Here's some advice (from Hilda Hutcherson) that we can really put to good use...

There are several videos at this same site...click along the links to the left of the video screen...she seems to have some pretty straightforward tips...**not direct quotes** like, if you want to have your partner more audible, be more audible...moan, groan, purr, scream...
and...
to encourage that your bedroom is a sexual playground...declutter and decorate appropriately... I'm giggling for several reasons here. You see I have a friend or two that when it comes to sex talk, they complain that their husbands aren't romantic...and having been in their bedrooms, where the clothing covered riding bicycle or treadmill takes center stage...I totally understand the reason why. Even if the exercise equipment has to share the space, make certain that there is a romantic feeling around your bed.
and...
make sex a priority...plan sex...although I disagree with penciling in the time onto your calendar...I'm more of the write it in permanent marker kind of girl...

It Hurts Here...And Here...

Okay, six months post car accident, I finally decide that I am tired of taking pain pills and muscle-relaxers because my back hurts...a trip to the Dr. only annoyed me more because she offered to prescribe different pain pills and muscle relaxers...it was one of those moments...

So, today I officially went for the initial chiropractor appointment...
I said, "It hurts here (between shoulderblades) and here (over kidneys)...
He said, "Look left, look right, lift your right arm, lift your left arm..."
I'm definitely feeling a hokey-pokey moment by this point...

My body scanned, x-rayed, and thing-a-ma-bobbed later, it was decided that my c-1,2,3 are really messed up...but then everything is fine until t12 or so...

Here's the thing...no treatment today...go back tomorrow for that...
But now, instead of hurting here an here...my everywhere hurts...I think it's psychosomatic...just admitting that I hurt at all increased my hurt level...

I'm looking forward to tomorrow though...

What Do I Do With My Time...?

Some days I just scratch my head wondering where the day went...
Writing, Yes I'm addicted.

Is that all I do with my time?
No, I also do Research! Let me just put it to you like this...if there is a webpage out there with new toys, new methods, or new thought behind BDSM...I'm on it

Sir Hotness has stopped looking over my shoulder because he is afraid of what I will find next;)

For example, Today I found a great little Bed and Bondage ...
1763~A Deviant Place of Decadence
(and not too far away for me and the honey to take off for an overnight**Wink**) So go ahead and click...check out the links...see the rooms, prices, and extras...then let your mind go wild with what you want to do once you get there...

Today, I also found a great little personal assistant (which I desperately need to keep me on track...because of the two above mentioned addictions...writing and researching)...I forget everything...

I am sooooo bad at remembering, I now set an alarm to remind me to pick up my daughter from school because after a dozen phone calls from Beautiful Girl saying, "Are you here yet?" Followed by my, "Oh shit! I'm heading that way now! I'm sorry...I was writing!" my excuse seems a little lame over the years even if it is honest...but there are still those days I forget to set the alarm...oh hell.

But then, there are days like today...
When I take a break...to enjoy the beautiful day and the company of my honey...
So we drank at The Pub awile...
Sir Hotness started with Fuller's ESB
I started with Speckled Hen
But then we quickly moved through Fuller's Golden Pride, Leffe, Belhaven Twisted Thistle and Tennants...
I am sooo glad that Sir Hotness loves beer...
And we even managed to pick up Beautiful Girl on time:)

Then it was home for a real sit down family dinner...
Sir Hotness tossed salad while I grilled salmon...

And now?
Mmmm...it's snuggle time...
What a beautiful day.

Living In The US Has It's Advantages...

Okay, so I'm not talking about merely living in the land of milk and honey when I say that the US has it's advantages and granted most of us don't think about it on a daily basis...but some of us do.

I am thankful and when someone in government gets too loud touting their fundamentalist religion background I get concerned...paranoid a little, you ask...I'll tell you, about some things being watchful is better than paranoid.

Lets face it, the US is a diverse melting pot...and I'm not talking nation of ancestry...we're religiously diverse and one of the few countries where putting a "Pagan and Proud" bumbersticker on your car won't have you living in fear. The witch trials really aren't that distant a horror...and religion is the cause of most violence in most countries. Witches are still burned alive overseas...

Another horror is the one that faces anyone who is sexually different...

If you've read the news about Mehdi Kazemi then you will know that his latest bid for asylum failed yesterday and he faces return to Iran and most probably hanging...for sodomy.

I don't know about you, but I'm thankful that no one gives a damn if I have a strap-on under the bed...

So if you haven't thought about the freedoms you do have...maybe today would be a good day to start.
PS
Hiking photos have been added to the blizzard hike post

A Hiking We Will Go...Cause We Have Snow!

The snow is Melting....
But I got some great pics this am from the long hike I took with Sir Hotness...
Which I will post first thing in the morning...

This has been a major procrasinating day.
Everything can wait.

Mostly because the injury from yesterday's hike (which is actually an injury
from martial arts a decade ago that haunts me whenever I want to have fun)started to really act up after today's hike. So I'm babying my leg a little bit...

Which kept me from shoveling the two foot high snow from the driveway...so I was thrilled when Sir Hotness jumped to the task...except now his back is killing him.

So we are quite a pair...
Aspirin anyone?

PS
For anyone else procrastinating...the time did officially change...so don't put off setting those clocks forward an hour...or your Monday may be hell.

**Editted by Roxy photos from the hike:)

Welcome Ohio Blizzard 2008

I am officially snowed in! I am soooooooooo EXCITED!

I have been watching it snow for the last 26 hours, waking up in the middle of the nigt to to make sure it was still snowing, up at 6a.m. and still snowing...

I gripe a lot about hating snow...

But this is what I love ... running, hiking, playing ... while it is snowing and no one else is out

I took the dogs out to play with me...

We ran, we jumped drifts...we didn't want to come back inside!

I hope it snows all day! And all night! I mean hey...it's a blizzard right? I should get at least two good snow days out of this...

Ooooo, I want to take the dogs on a snow hike...I'll try to post more pics later...I gotta get my boots back on!

*****

I'm back! What an awesome day! Walking in the snow makes me Soooooo happy!

Even if I was wading drifts 2-3 ft high, slid down an icy slope on my ass, and twisted my knee.

The walk around the lake (2mi) was amazing!! We startled geese, Petey sniffed out every rabbit and rodent hole along the way, and even Sir Hotness had a marvelous time:) Poor Jazzi got left at home because she is so small I thought she might frostbite her paws...

Here's the photo damage...