4.11.2009

Three Days Until Edge

Edge Play: High risk BDSM play which may fall outside the lines of safe and sane but are still consensual, including physical threat (guns, knives or breath control), emotional threat (phobias, past traumas, or childhood memories), or activities which challenge social taboos.

What is emotional edge play and what makes it so damn fascinating?

I have been fascinated by edge play since before I had a name for what my first husband was “doing to me”…I thought he was nuts. Why would anyone want to “get in my head”, “mess with my mind”, “torture me” with words? And then I realized he was getting off on it. The interplay between us when I was devastated…a horrifyingly, ugly, emotional mess…think tears and snot and well, worse than that without the graphic detail…really did it for him. And in a way, I suppose it did it for me as well, because I still think about those times, more than anything else we did together.

At the time, I hated him.

There are nights…the intensity is all I can think about.

No one has ever made my heart pound so hard, no one has ever fucked my mind so totally. It was a rollercoaster ride that cannot be explained but only experienced.

So back to the question, what is emotional edge play?

There are hundreds of definitions if you use a search engine, but in my mind it is the creation of an emotional state using past or current emotional stressors that is then toyed with, manipulated, through the power exchange. It is the ability to take someone to the brink of fear or anger or jealousy and then tip them over the edge while still holding onto them. It is actions and words that provoke a huge emotional reaction.

Edge Play is not for novice players. Really. This is not the stuff you do on Saturday night for shits and giggles because the results can be far reaching.


Edge written by Roxy Harte

For the ménage of Autumn, Jonas, and Michael, their SM play is dark and dangerous, and for one sadism isn't a game at all…it's an illness.

BUY IT on Tuesday April 14th!

1 comment:

Julia Smith said...

Thanks for the personal post today, Roxy. To be honest, having trained at film school, I think pretty much all actors and directors take part in this Edge Play. They head into a project like partners in a consensual BDSM encounter. The actor places his trust in the director, and gives consent to allow the director to do or say whatever it takes to get the right emotions on film.

I dealt with a male rape scene for my fourth year film, and had to speak to my professor about how badly I felt, asking my actor to go to the places I needed him to go. But my professor assured me that the actor would not agree if I did not have his consent.

However, since I know personally that I seem to have an ease in getting people to get excited about what I'm excited about, I felt ill at ease with the 'consent'. Maybe I was just coercing my actor by that strange persuasive power I have. It's really taken me about 15 years to realize my professor was right. LOL! That sounds so typical, doesn't it?

But reading about English actor Richard Armitage agreeing to be waterboarded for a scene in 'MI-5' ('Spooks') last year finally made it all settle in my mind. Actors like to go to that edge. It doesn't matter that waterboarding is a recognized torture and that it's known to make everyone crack. He wanted to experience it in a 'safe' environment on set. His choice. My professor was right.

The actor hated it and nearly flipped out, by the way. But the whole thing could have been stopped at any time by that actor, so there you go. It was more important for him to be taken to the begging-for-it-to-stop place, ultimately.