12.18.2008

Is It Time To Spice Up Your Sex Life?


Okay, I admit it...I'm still in that happily blissful honeymoon phase ... two years later... but I also admit that I NEED variety... and I am loathe to ever be one of the 48% of American women who are not sexually satisfied in their relationships...

I'm sorry... I still don't get THAT ... and I tend to harp on it ... a lot! Sexual satisfaction is not your partner's responsibility ... DO SOMETHING ... take matters into your own hands ... really!

But that is not today's soapbox...
Today I want to talk about spicing it up! Change the routine...assuming that 99% of the time you do fall into the same routine, and don't worry about apologizing for that, we all do it...we figure out what works and we do THAT. Easy as 1-2-3-screaming orgasm...I like that too...but it can get a little, dare I say it? Mundane. Yes, even the tie me up and spank me first can get a little ...routine.

So with a few experiments...you can heat up the winter nights:)
Here are a few ideas I'm working on for adding some steam to my winter nights...

1. HOTEL Sex: I admit it, I have a hotel fetish...it started when I was young...too young...sneaking around with that week's hottie...and after a back seat of a too small Honda or two...I started going halvsies on a hotel room...I still get horny every time I see a Red Roof Inn...all that rolling around in crisp sheets, the handy ice bucket for sensation play...at a hotel, you can be yourself...or you can be any number of other women...which brings me to...

2. Role-playing: In my head, I'm often Daddy's Little Girl(and I'm a very bad little girl)...okay, that's a secret that even Sir Hotness doesn't know...so shhhhhh... but seriously...I've been thinking about bringing some of my fantasies out of my brain and into the bed...although admittedly I SCARE SIR HOTNESS SOMETIMES with my ideas...so I have to suggest things slowly, and maybe you will need to add some fantasies gradually...the trick is to make suggestions...I usually offer mine over dinner, right after he took a big bite... if he can chew and respond, I know that we can proceed to the planning stage...if he chokes and takes a minute to breathe normally, I know I've pushed a boundary... one idea he did respond to with enthusiasm was my WILD Animal Game...

3. Animals Come Out To Play: First, pick a species...Second, stay in character as long as possible. His favorite is chimpanzees, my favorite is wolves. So I'll say, "Let's go have some wild monkey sex" that's about as mundane-code as it gets at our house...or I'll just sneak up behind him and start sniffing him like a dog...that usually gets my point across that I want a little rough and wild wolf action...ahem...I've suggested Klingon-games but so far, that's a no-go, I bite too hard without the encouragement of fair-roughness...

4. Marathon Day: is my absolutely favorite. When is the last time you spent the entire day in bed having sex? Been awhile? Let me tell you, the rush is incredible...after a day of orgasm after orgasm after...you get the point...you will start to feel positively "high" ... so pick a day and pick a number, for example you don't stop until both of you have orgasmed 12 times...or shoot for one orgasm per hour for a twenty-four hour marathon...

And if you have a fun way that isn't mentioned here...chime in on the comment section...I'd love to hear how you are spicing up your sex life!

4 comments:

Rhonda Leigh Jones said...

For people who would like a little...ok, a lot...more intensity in their lives there is always roleplay with a deep psychological element. Such as interrogation games, in which one person is restrained and the other goes about getting "secret information" from them. This could be as fictional as pretending to be secret agents from opposing organizations to using the situation to really let some emotions out. If fear supercharges your sex drive and your partner has the ability to be scary, then this is a great way to get there. This is advanced-level playing so proceed with caution. And don't forget the after care!

Anonymous said...

What sex life?? I am 29 and can't remember the last time I turned my boyfriend on. Do all guys lose it in their late 30's???

Roxy Harte said...

Ooooo, RLJ...
I'd love to get more of your take on interrogation games. I cannot remember the last time my adrenaline rush topped that of my last IS...

Roxy Harte said...

Anonymous,
Thirty is a little young to completely lose interest...now if you'd have said forty...it happens...testosterone levels do lessen...

That said, Any Man...no matter what his age can be highly sexual again, the trick is to engage his interest. Men are very visual. And sometimes a little thick headed. I'm 44, I've learned the hard way...no more romantic dinners, or sexy nighties, or subtle hints (all fun granted but honestly, more enticing for us than them)

I use games to add variety...
But to even play a game, you have to get him "interested"

Be aggressive, try taking control of the situation and see if he responds...

Good Luck
Roxy