A Psychology Lesson

Once upon a time, almost thirty-five years ago, I was the tom-boy on the street. I only played with the boys, telling my mother that the girls played stupid games...the boys played all the cool games, like cobs and robbers, cowboys and indians, prison of war...

I liked to play with the boys because I always ended up being tied up, restrained...sometimes abused, but it was never sexual...I didn't learn it could be sexual and a game adults played until much much later.

All I knew was that I liked it, needed it...craved it. On the days I wasn't allowed to play outside...I took care of my own needs with toy handcuffs, ropes, sheets...anything that I could use to feel "good".

Sound like a child in need of serious psychological counceling? It seems I'm not alone...

Tonight, while doing research for Dr. Psycho's character, I found this interesting article in Psychology Today which I will quote from here:
"Bind my ankles with your white cotton rope so I cannot walk. Bind my wrists so I cannot push you away. Place me on the bed and wrap your rope tighter around my skin so it grips my flesh. Now I know that struggle is useless, that I must lie here and submit to your mouth and tongue and teeth, your hands and words and whims. I exist only as your object. Exposed.

Of every 10 people who reads these words, one or more has experimented with sadomasochism (S & M), which is most popular among educated, middle- and upper-middle-class men and women, according to psychologists and ethnographers who have studied the phenomenon."

You can read the entire article here.

Funny, I've never thought of myself as unusual...I thought I had the normal childhood experiences...until I shared a little too much and was told just how "weird" my listener thought I was...thank goodness their opinion didn't matter so much although I admit, for a bit, I kept my desires secret...throwing out "bait" on occasion, off color remarks, jokes, simple words...to see how people would react...and in doing so, I found the niche in society who were just as "weird" as I was...and amazingly, many of us did share very early experiences, as this Psychology Today article also indicates. Here's a few quotes I found noteworthy...

"The satisfaction gained from S & M is something far more than sex," explains Roy Baumeister, Ph.D., a social psychologist at Case Western Reserve University. "It can be a total emotional release."

Meredith Reynolds, Ph.D., the Sexuality Research Fellow of the Social Science Research Council, confirms that childhood experiences may shape a person's sexual outlook.
"Sexuality doesn't just arise at puberty" she says. "Like other pans of someone's personality, sexuality develops at birth and takes a developmental course through a person's life span."

"I'm interested in manipulating what's in the mind," Lily Fine (a professional dominatrix who teaches S & M workshops across North America,) says. "The brain is the greatest erogenous zone."