How Do I Get An Erotic Scene Started?

author Nina Pierce sent this to me in a Private message and I'd like to thank her for giving me permission to move her question and my answer here...hope it's of benefit to everyone...and if anyone wants to dive in with questions, comments of your own...the water's fine:)

Also, this works in real life too people...so if there is something kinky you want to do in the bedroom...try it!!

[QUOTE=Nina Pierce]Roxy,
I have a character in my WIP that is considering experimenting with BDSM with his partner. I'm emailing to ask... ummm... and how does one go about introducing this into the bedroom? Can't seem to put myself in that frame of mind.

Any suggestions on good reads that might have an insight to the beginning of this type of relationship?

Had to ask you as you seem to be quite the authority. LOL! :D
Thanks![/QUOTE]

Hi Nina,
Actually this is just the type of question I'm trying to encourage at my Roxy TalkCast ... I'd love to get more authors involved in my current topic "What Makes Erotica Erotic?"

There is actually an AWESOME podcast that covers the very subject of you original question ... how do I introduce this to my spouse, lover, FB etc...that you can listen to by going to Misstress Matisse Podcast ... I think she does a really nice job...

I have a short story that I am working on that involves a person in the scene with someone who is not in the scene...

This is the formula I used for my short story: Poppin' His Cherry
1.From a Dominant POV mention whatever you want to have happen in everyday talk, do not wait until couple is in the bedroom...
for example my male character says absolutely no way to anal and my heroine is just dying to try out a new strap-on...so over lunch, "I got a new toy in the mail today." of course when she reveals, he chokes on his cola...and declines, "Uh-uh, no way, not happening..."
2. From her Dom POV she wants him to keep her request on his mind by adding it into conversation the next day, not asking or begging mind you, just teasing ...example..."You better watch it, mister, or I'll pull out my strap-on" ... the only way this works is if the readers believe she is teasing and he believes she is teasing...
3. From Hero's Submissive POV...he's thinking about it when she isn't around wondering about it...what would it be like? He really can't get the image out of his head
4. Kick it up a notch ...my heroine plays with the rim of his anus the next time they are together...
5. Now he's really thinking about it...so much so that it is interfering with his job, his hobbies etc
6. next romantic encounter open the dialogue again ...My hero asks, "Why would you want to..." showing my heroine's POV as "yes, this is something I would enjoy doing w you...but I wouldn't be asking if I didn't think I could make it enjoyable for you as well" ...
7. my relunctant hero starts to share the faantasy
8. I'm ready to close the deal...my hero asks "Can we try it with a safe word? And if I want you to stop... you will?"
9. Commence the big scene.

Does this help?

Hugs
Roxy