To celebrate release day yesterday, here is an excerpt from CONTROL!
Excerpt starts here:
After watching the scene, I wait for Mistress Minerva in her dressing room. I am nervously destroying one of my fingernails with my teeth. There are note cards hanging on her wall, hundreds of them, and I can’t curb my curiosity. I find that each card expresses a different sentiment: “I adore you,” “Thank you,” “You have helped me want to keep living,” but they all have a similar theme -- gratitude. I think of the man she was just with, screaming and begging, and wonder how they can feel such gratitude when their pain seems to outweigh their pleasure, but does it really? I let out a few screams yesterday…is it the same thing? She didn’t humiliate me, not like that man today…is that the difference? Would I have felt differently yesterday if she had humiliated me?
I honestly don’t know. I do know that I only came here with one thought…orgasm. I think orgasm was the farthest thought from this man’s mind today.
“What did you think?” Minerva asks as she walks into the dressing room and closes the door.
“I don’t know what to think, to be honest.”
“I like honesty.” She stands beside me, watching me sit, and I wonder now if I should have stood when she entered. Oops. I stand now and she smiles, taking the chair I just exited. “What you saw bothered you?”
“A little.” I nod, asking as an afterthought, “Why did he obey you? He wasn’t a meek guy. When you first entered the dungeon he was wearing a suit and tie. He was obviously successful -- self-assured.”
“It bothers you because you saw a little of your fiancé in that man?”
I sigh heavily, admitting, “Yes. I saw a lot of Stephen’s personality in that man.”
Looking in the large makeup mirror, she takes down her ponytail and hands me a brush. “Brush my hair.”
I take it and begin to brush her hair without a second thought.
“In answer to your question, people obey when you assume they will. I didn’t ask him to take off his clothing. I told him to take off his clothing and by the tone of my voice, he knew it was expected.”
“Stephen would never do anything like that.”
She watches me in the mirror thoughtfully. “I disagree. From what you have told me about Stephen and knowing how other men with his personality traits respond, I think you would be surprised. You should try an experiment. Show him your confidence and command him to do something. I’ll bet he will do it.”
“You make it sound so simple.”
“Was it hard for me to convince you to brush my hair?”
“That’s different!” I laugh. “I’m only brushing your hair.”
“Really? Is that all?” She asks. “I thought you were obeying your Mistress…and when my slaves obey me, I find great pleasure in that.”
I gasp, lowering the brush as I realize that she is rubbing her clit.
“I didn’t say you could quit.”
“I’m sorry, Mistress.” I cover my mouth with my hand, shocked that I answered her with such ease. Raising up the brush again, I look at her and see that she is waiting patiently.
I start again, brushing her hair. She pours a little oil onto her mons and starts again, touching herself while I brush her hair.
“Not all power games have to be as harsh as the one you just witnessed. A woman can be in total control by merely being…completely female.” I think about what she is saying, but it seems a riddle to me. Am I daft? Or do I just not completely understand the games played here?